Parental Punishments Essay

Parental Punishments Essay-54
Even the kindest and most well-intentioned parent will sometimes become exasperated.

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Later, parental criticism or punishment may convince him that the price he has to pay for his act is too high. When we tell a child that we disapprove of what he has done but are convinced that his intentions were good, our positive approach will make it relatively easy for him to listen to us and not close his mind in defense against what we have to say.

And while he still might not like our objecting, he will covet our good opinion of him enough to want to retain it, even if that entails a sacrifice.

However, punishment teaches foremost the desirability of not getting caught, so the child who before punishment was open in his actions now learns to hide them and becomes devious.

The more hurtful the punishment, the more devious the child will become.

And when the child is old enough and able, he will try to use such force himself—for instance, punishing his parents by acting in ways most distressing to them.

Thus parents would be well advised to keep in mind Shakespeare's words: "They that have power to hurt and will do none ....

In the end the parent's goal—to eliminate bad language from the child's vocabulary—is rarely achieved.

Instead, the punishment serves to convince the child that although the parent is very much concerned with overt behavior, he is completely uninterested in whatever annoyance compelled the child to use bad language.

At any moment a child believes that whatever he is doing is fully justified.

If he takes a forbidden cookie, to his mind the intensity of his desire justifies the act.


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